Once again I’ve neglected my blog. I’ve thought quite a few times I needed to do some writing but I didn’t want to cry. My little L is on my heart and I have been/am worried about him. He missed three days of school before Christmas vacation due to running a fever/tonsillitis. He was pitiful. He had his tonsils and adenoids removed the day after Christmas. It took most of his Christmas vacation to get healed from surgery. He is resting so much better and doing great physically. L continues to have social, behavior issues. He just seems to be getting worse. He has been refusing to do classwork. He won’t stay in his seat. He has meltdowns. He threw blocks in class last week and busted a little girl’s hand. He won’t follow directions. He yells and screams in class and at home. It really seems out of his control. I had him referred to be evaluated at the children’s hospital in the region. It may take a while to have him seen. I just don’t know what to do in the meantime. I am wincing at the thought of how he is behaving. You can speak to him and he won’t respond. He won’t maintain eye contact. Something isn’t right. I’m afraid for his future.
Surgery
June 12, 2013 – Worst Hair Day Ever!
Since my last post, I had begun regularly walking and doing back exercises every day. After the soreness of the first couple days eased, I was enjoying the benefits of exercise. The back exercises had helped my scoliosis pain tremendously and put my mind in a positive outlook. I had been enjoying challenging myself with power walking. My best time I had worked up to was 39 minutes for a 2.5 mile distance. It was a challenge and it felt amazing to say that “I did this” and “scoliosis will not kick my butt”. I’m having to cut out the exercise temporarily due to recovering from pilar cyst excision earlier this week. Surgery went well. I was put under general anesthesia. It was a large pilar cyst as expected. I have 8 staples in my scalp right now. The surgical nurse was considerate to not shave too much off my head. I’ve been doing well overall since surgery. B has taken excellent care of me including putting antibiotic ointment on my wound twice per day and helping me take my pain med every 4 hours to control the pain. B has done all the laundry, cooking, and everything else. He has been amazing and I’m thankful he is my very involved person. Otherwise, today is the first day my throat hasn’t hurt from where the tube was placed during surgery. I suspect the muscle relaxant used prior to tube placement caused the neck stiffness and muscle pains. It is better today too. I hope I can ease off the loratab soon. I’m having the staples removed next week and I hope that area will be numbed up first. I’m looking forward to being healed up, all hair grown back, and to be able to exercise again. I just can’t get sweaty and loratab makes me loopy.
May 23, 2013 – Diagnosis Scoliosis, Surgery, and Coping
She (costochondritis) seems to be easing with the meds, heating pad, and rest. I am glad for that and I really hope it will not be a chronic issue. I learned my scoliosis x-ray results today. I do have mild scoliosis. It is an 18 degree curve at T 11 on my spine. I’ll go back for follow-up x-rays in 6 months to check if the scoliosis is progressing. I also have some back exercises to try that my doctor recommended. I’m relieved to have an answer but I’m afraid of what progression could mean if that occurs. If I hadn’t had heartburn and abdominal pain, I wouldn’t have had the upper GI done. I’m glad the upper GI was normal but that also showed the curve I had no idea was there. I’m thankful I spoke up and asked for the scoliosis x-rays. I’m glad to know what is going on there. It explains possibly the costochondritis. I think I can blame losing an inch in height with scoliosis. I’ve been thinking I’ve been imagining feeling like my shoulders were off in some way and my posture was harder to maintain. I know I wasn’t imagining that now. It is an uneasy feeling with a touch of relief if that makes any sense. I’ve just got to put the what ifs aside and deal with each day. It may mean I’m dealing with pain like I have the last few days in my left shoulder and back.
On another layer medical mess, I saw a surgeon this week about removing my pilar cyst. It showed up about 6 months after I gave birth to the little men. It wasn’t that big at first and I wish I had it dealt with back then. It could have been an in office procedure. Unfortunately, I’ve let the cyst grow to the point I’m having outpatient surgery for removal under general anesthesia at the hospital next month. It is a little bigger around than a quarter and is raised about a half inch. I’ve lost hair on the cyst so I have a bit of a bald area on the top left of my head. A pilar cyst isn’t really the kind of thing that can be drained. It is an encasement of keratin. The whole capsule has to be removed. I think I’m dreading finding out how much hair was shaved in the surgical area, seeing the scar, and the pain as it heals. The surgeon said he wouldn’t know if he would use staples or stitches until he is working on it. He also said cutting on the scalp causes excessive bleeding when removing a pilar cyst. He told me that a bunch of goop would be put on the wound that can be washed out in the shower the next day. I’m guessing that June 10th will be the worst hair day ever.
I’m focused on leaning on B, my family, LM and other dear friends when things get too much. I was reminded recently that all that is going on with my health doesn’t just affect me. It affects B and the boys too. I’m really working on talking about my feelings and what I need with B. I’m trying not to hold everything in. I’ve got to pray about things. God will help me through the hard days.
March 21, 2012 – Surgery for L
I’m in a better emotional place than I was when writing the previous post. I was having a series of frustrating days filled with pain and depression. Somewhere between talking about it with B and feeling much encouraged after attending church, I’m in a better state of mind. Nothing is really fixed but my attitude is better. Anyhoo, L has surgery tomorrow to repair the meatal stenosis. It is outpatient surgery. It will probably take longer to put him under general anesthesia and back out than the actual surgery. I’m optimistic that after L has healed that we have a chance to get back on track with potty training and him not being in constant discomfort. I’m a little nervous for him but I’m praying about it and just trying to hope for the best.
Hooting Right Along 